Wonderful Woman

To say that I 'enjoyed' Wonder Woman would be an understatement of epic proportions. 

My friend accidentally booked tickets to a show for the wrong week and, unfortunately, I couldn't make the show next week due to work so we ended up seeing this film last night after a lovely dinner (I couldn't eat much. I'd gotten tipsy with Jane (my best friend) at lunch that afternoon). 
My friend wasn't really into it but I begged her and we booked our seats. 

What I didn't realise was that the film doesn't officially come out until today, which may explain why the theatre was so full. 

I loved it though. It was incredible! From the island of Amazon women living and cohabiting peacefully on this beautiful hidden island to the action-packed scenes where Gal Gadot truly got to show the world what woman can do... I was hooked from start to finish. 
Even my friend liked it. 

Growing up, there wasn't much representation for women-led movies that had such a strong and passionate female lead and this was as little as ten years ago. 
Wonder Woman embraces her power and seeks to fight for the greater good, inherently believing that love is the most powerful and important thing we have in this world. 

Regardless of where you are in your life, it's always empowering and exciting to see a strong and intelligent woman kick ass on the big screen and I'm so excited by the fact that millions of little girls get to see such a woman doing incredible things. 

Jessica
xoxo

The Fake Boyfriend

We all know how it goes.
Generally, if you're a girl, you're going to get hit on on a night out.

Sometimes, that's wanted attention.
Sometimes, it isn't.

For me, the attention I got the other night was not wanted.
My girlfriend was out to 'pull' but I wasn't and I was trying very hard to be a good 'wingwoman'. It worked but, unfortunately, some of the guys she was with had friends who grabbed me and tried to dance with me.

Now, I love dancing. When it comes to that, I'm as game as Ellen and I don't need a partner to get crazy like Taylor Swift does at award shows. ('I'm dancing on my own. Make the moves up as I go')
But I don't love it when guys grab me and dance with me when I make it clear I'm not interested.
So I did what any rationally thinking 20 year old does to make it clear to the guy and told them I had a boyfriend.
That should be enough, right?
If a guy I started dancing with told me he had a girlfriend, I'd nod and say 'sorry' and dance in the opposite direction.
These guys? Nope. They didn't care. One of them told me I was 'gorgeous' so I thanked him but he was still dancing close against me so I repeated the 'boyfriend' thing and he just laughed and said 'let yourself go'. I did not want to do that so I gave my friend the warning glance and we danced away to a different part of the club.
When our guy friends got back, I almost pounced on them; I was that relieved.
One of them was also 'on the pull' so I asked the one non-single guy if he'd do me a favour and pretend to be my boyfriend. He laughed and asked which guy was a creep so I simply said 'all of them'.
One guy was nice though. He started dancing near me and I told him I had a boyfriend and hugged my friend and he shook his hand!
Like, actually shook his hand!
I'm not gonna lie. That made me feel kinda good inside and my friend said it was a good gesture.

Anyway, this is actually an issue.
You see, this may be a casual story about a night out but the problem with it is that I shouldn't have had to think of an excuse in the first place. If I don't want to dance with someone, that should be enough of a reason. I shouldn't have to say the word 'boyfriend' fifty times until I can get away from them for it to be realized that I'm not interested.

I'm not saying I was really angry about it but it's frustrating that girls and women have to make up an excuse while guys just don't dance with the girl.

Maybe it was just that club. Maybe it was the fact that it was a Tuesday.
I don't know.
But it shouldn't be an issue in 2016. Have we not come further than that?

At the end of the day, it didn't ruin my night and I still had fun with my friends.

It's just food for thought, you know?

Jessica
xoxo

#WeStandWithZoe

So, apparently, some people have forgotten that women are no longer expected to go to such extremes as hiding their ankles (Looking at you, Victorian Britain!). 

The hashtag above has been trending for the past few hours and it's infuriating. 

Earlier today, The Sun and The Daily Mail published articles about how lifestyle vlogger, beauty queen and all-around incredible person Zoella (Zoe Sugg) had 'shed her wholesome image' after posting a photo of herself in her underwear.

Firstly, it's hardly a racy photo. Most of her body is covered and she's wearing a T-Shirt. 

Secondly, how f*cking dare they. 

Who are they to be telling a 25 year old woman that she isn't allowed to feel comfortable or proud of her own body? 

She's a gorgeous, talented, successful woman. 

She may have young fans but Justin Bieber has young fans and you don't see the media shaming him after every naked Instagram post. 

I can't believe I live in a time where women are still shamed because of their bodies and men are praised for it. 

I'll leave you with a final photo. 

Goodnight!

Jessica

xoxo

What Women Want

Today, I went on Facebook and an article immediately caught my eye.

To be fair, this happens a lot with me. Especially with Buzzfeed... I may have an addiction. I'm on my Buzzfeed app faster than I'm replying to texts in the morning. I love their writers, staff and general ease you feel when you read one of their articles. Much like I'm coming to fall in love with HelloGiggles.
This particular article felt like it needed to be written about. By me. In my own words.
It helps with my procrastination anyway. I was attempting to write a song...
In this article, a girl at New Mexico State University in Las Cruces found a strange note by an unidentified, male student at her college posted in her dorm on January 29th this year.
The note states: 

"OK, ladies. 

I get it.You don’t want a pleasant evening chat.You don’t want a gentleman to walk you to your car.You don’t want a friendly dude to help you carry your groceries… or hold open the door… or crush the life out of other men that would do you harm.Fine - fear the good guys… I guess we’ll have to just suffer through watching you get broken over and over by the scum you think you love.But I want you to know – it’s not easy and it hurts to see you fall.

Give the good guys a chance to help you be less afraid of the world."

The note comes across extremely creepy and I had to comment on Facebook the second I saw it.

'I think there should be a balance between both. You should be a 'nice', good person because people deserve good people and they're one in a million. The thing that the not-so-nice person who wrote this isn't understanding is that chivalry and protection is what some women want but not all. Women want different things. I roll my eyes at super coupley things like some of the posts people who have been dating for five minutes share on Facebook or putting a love lock on a bridge in Paris because you think it has any direct correlation with how long your relationship will last BUT a lot of people find that stuff adorable and love it. Not every women likes chivalry and men holding doors open for them just like not every guy likes women who don't wear much makeup - it's human nature. This man, clearly, hasn't grasped the concept of what it means to actually be a 'nice' guy.'

It's not easy to watch people you love or care about being hurt by the same kind of people but you should do something about it rather than complaining they're going after the wrong guys and should be dating you.
A lot of the other comments were angry because of the strong sense of entitlement the note is drenched in but I was more frustrated by the idea that nice guys are easy to find and that us women are deliberately falling for people who end up hurting.
Another point is that it takes more to being a good guy than holding doors open for women and walking them to their cars at night.
To be a good person, you actually have to work hard to maintain a good attitude and loving nature.
Plus, my point in that comment is that NOT ALL PEOPLE WANT A NICE GUY/GIRL.
Now, I put that, as Judge Rinder says, in big because it's important.
No matter what else the guy's saying or how creepy it comes across, he doesn't seem to understand the idea that no one wants the same thing.
I have friends who meet guys on tinder and have relationships and I have friends who would never date a guy they met online.
Much like the way no one has an identically decorated home, no one has the same type.
My type, in terms of personality, remains the same as it's always been. You know: loyal, caring, humorous, slightly chivalrous, strong (mentally and physically). Though, my recent experience with that guy I've been hung up on for months actually taught me a lot more about myself than I ever expected. I know now that I want a man who can turn me on - both sensually and intellectually - and that he needs to be able to 'take the mick' out of me because I do that to people and I find it playful.
All that being said, you could ask Sarah (made up name on the spot) what her type is and she could say she wants a serious guy who's not chivalrous at all and doesn't find bad jokes hilarious (like I do).
If you've managed to persevere reading all of that, I commend you.
Here's my final point on it; if you want to be a good guy, BE A GOOD GUY but don't expect all women to fall at your feet like you're Gerard Butler, Daniel Craig or Darren Criss (the last one's a personal favourite). The second you start expecting things from people is the second your 'trying to be a nice guy' comes across as an act rather than a genuinely nice thing.
Not all women want a good, nice guy. Not all men want a good girl.
No two people are going to have the same exact type all of the time so consider this before making anymore declarations. 

And, to all the genuinely nice guys out there, thank you for being kind and gracious and respectful. 

Three of my best friends are guys and I couldn't love them more if I tried.
Jessica
xoxo

Who Run The World?

Definitely not girls. 

Yet. 

It's International Women's Day across the world! 

How could I not write about this? 

In a world where people do work on their phones and send it in while on the train to their office and teenagers become famous by uploading videos to YouTube, it's amazing to see how far we, as humans, have come. 

Technology is, in my mind, one of the biggest areas in terms of visibly seeing our affect on the world. 

If you don't count global warming, that is. 

Which a lot of people don't. 

But that isn't my point. 

This post is about women's rights. 

Which brings me back to technology. 

As amazing as it is to see how far we've come in that regard, it's disappointing to think that we still live in a world where a woman is questioned for running for President because she's a grandmother. How will she govern? How will she make fair decisions for America when she has a grandchild? 

Let's forget her decades of work in politics or her educational background or her years of experience as First Lady and, instead, focus on the fact that she's a grandmother. 

The thing is, as far as we've come in these last few years in so many different areas, we've not progressed very far in terms of equality. 

Women still don't make as much as men for the same jobs and we are constantly being criticized on so many different levels. 

And I'm not just talking about by political leaders or people of power. 

Women get picked on, by other women, for going to work when they have kids or choosing a career over family but we also get bullied for not going to work when we have children or working from home when we have a family. 

It doesn't matter what you do as a woman because you'll get criticized. 

Now, I'm not blaming any one person or group of individuals - as much as I would love to blame Donald Trump for every injustice in the world and have him sent to Azkaban for all of eternity - for all of this because it's not the fault of any one person; it's women. 

Women are a huge part of the problem and a lot of people are too scared to admit that. 

We want rights and we deserve them but we need to change our own attitudes and perceptions first. 

Let's stop hating on women for not doing what we think they should and support women for whatever it is they choose to do. 

You don't want kids? Don't have them. 

Want to stay at home with your children and be there full-time for them? Awesome! Let's support that! 

Whatever you choose to do as a woman, let's applaud that! 

You don't need to be compared to anyone else and you are not someone else's opinion of you. 

This goes for overweight women, slimmer women, girly women and tomboys. 

Because every woman has been judged for some aspect of themselves. 

As Emma Watson has said: 

"I don't want other people to decide who I am; I want to decide that for myself."

Let's give women the power to decide who we are for ourselves and be proud of each and every one of our individualities because every person in this world is worth something. 

Every person. 

Hillary is just one example of why we still need to go a long way in terms of women's equality and feminism but we are making progress. 

This has been a long time coming and I'm not saying we haven't made any progress because we have and that's important to note. 

So have fun celebrating women today and let's continue to teach ourselves and every woman we know to support other women. 

Jessica

xoxo

This Love Is Good

When I got onto Facebook this morning, one of the first things to catch my eye in the 'Trending' part on the right side of the screen was 'Calvin Harris and Taylor Swift'. 

As a huge 'Swiftie', my eyes were drawn to it and I clicked the blue letters instantly. 

So many articles have already been written in the last few hours about it. 

The 'news' is that Calvin and Taylor celebrated their first anniversary on Sunday. 

Some are skeptical and mocking of Taylor but the ones I've read were filled with words like 'adorable' and 'sweet'.

I, for one, am so incredibly happy for them. 

The couple met at last year's Brit awards in February and managed to keep their new relationship private for two months before the rumor mill started turning in May. 

Since then, they have proven themselves to be a supportive power-couple; with Taylor frequently showing up at Calvin's gigs and Calvin accompanying Taylor to award shows, looking proud in the audience at her concerts and tweeting/instagramming his support for her several times.

Calvin Harris is a huge component in why Taylor has been so happy and empowered recently. It makes my heart happy - that sounds cheesy as Hell, I'm aware! - to know she's in a positive, loving relationship with a man who shows nothing but respect and adoration for her. 

What we can't forget is that another large part of Taylor's happiness is down to her fans, family and close friends. 

She has inspired me, and so many other women, to find friends who are positive influences in our lives. Strong, confident, intelligent, womderful women who inspire me to be better every day - just by being their friend.

Will this be Taylor's everlasting love? 

I don't know. 

One thing I do know is that Taylor is happy and in love and still continuing to be a better person than most of us could ever dream to be on a daily basis. 

Congratulations on one year, Calvin and Taylor! 

May it be the first of many.

Jessica

xoxo

P.S. That necklace is gorgeous. I definitely wouldn't mind one similar if I ever make it to a year with someone other than a girlfriend...

Happy Mother's Day!

It's Mother's Day here in the UK. 

A day that is, traditionally, spent celebrating the woman who brought you into this world - your mum.

Or, you know, a Hallmark Holiday invented by card businesses to capitalise on the public's love of celebrating. 

While I'm all for appreciating your mother, I don't think it should be all about that one person because, for many, it isn't. 

I was raised by my grandmother and my aunt continues to guide me through life with her never-ending mum-isms. 

My mum has always been around and she is a trier, you know? She tries her best. 

But we don't see eye to eye on a lot of things and that's neither of our faults. 

I still love her though. Unconditionally. 

A lot of people don't have Hallmark relationships with their parents. I use that term because so many cards are filled with loving poems about mothers and not all of them apply to everyone. 

It's for this reason that I'm taking the time to spend my hungover (more on that later) Mother's Day feeling grateful for the woman who made me me. 

Mother's Day isn't just about the woman who brought you into this world, it's about the women who bring you up. So Happy Mother's Day to all the women who raise daughters they didn't give birth to and who teach us to be strong, brave and who always believe in us when we don't believe in ourselves! 

Jessica

xoxo

Girls Against Girls

There's always going to be something women pick on each other for. Hair, weight, style, job, lack of job, career choice... It's, unfortunately, something women do. 

Recently, Amy Schumer has been accused of 'skinny shaming' Taylor Swift. 

In my opinion, any kind of weight shaming is not okay and should be called out immediately. 

Amy is a well-known comedienne and she's done great things over the last year or so in terms of her creative projects. But the jokey comment on Instagram isn't funny due to the fact that it's a joke on Taylor Swift's slim figure. 

She comments that she made the joke about her own weight and the fact she doesn't have a thigh gap but it's not really relevant. I understand she's a fan of Taylor and that she wants to explain away her joke but it strictly wasn't funny. You can't joke about someone's weight. 

This is her original post: 

Yes, it's a flippant comment but, again, there are limits to what's alright to joke about. Weight is never one of them. Whether you're fat, thin, curvy, petite, whatever - it's never okay to make a joke at someone's expense because of it. I'm glad people are calling her out on it because no one should be exempt from being told something isn't right. 

I had to comment on the article I read a few minutes ago. This is what I put: 

WOMEN NEED TO SUPPORT OTHER WOMEN! 

That's my point here. I know it may seem as if some of us are just 'overreacting' to a joke but that's my point. Taylor may be strong enough to ignore stupid posts like this but me making the same joke to a friend or aquaintence could really upset them. 

Joking about someone's weight is NEVER okay. 

Let's get back to supporting each other. 

Congratulations on your GRAMMY's win and incredible performance, Taylor! 

Jessica

xoxo

http://www.cosmopolitan.co.uk/entertainment/news/a41324/taylor-thats-not-a-thigh-gap/?utm_content=buffer66b81&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer 

Edit: 

In the hours since I posted this, I have found out that Amy Schumer posted a response to the anger over her skinny shaming. 

Denying any responsibility when your 'joke' has offended people just makes the whole situation worse. Regardless of what your intent might have been, laughing it off when a large amount of people were hurt by your comment makes it seem like you don't care. 

If I were to say the same thing and people got offended, I would apologize. It's the right thing to do. If people are upset because of a silly comment you made, you apologize to them for it. 

I'm all for women supporting women but I don't know if I can support Amy Schumer after this. It may be a small thing to a lot of people but I am surrounded by people who have had weight issues every day and it's not fair to them to laugh it off like it's nothing. 

We need to keep calling people out for it. This isn't okay. 

Jessica

xoxo

Hopelessly Devoted To... Yourself

Most of us can say that we've gone after someone who wasn't right for us. Maybe they were already dating someone? Maybe they were not right for us in every sense of the word thanks to different opinions? Maybe they were too young or too old? Maybe they didn't know how to treat us?

Whatever it was, we've all been there and it's not a fun place to be. 

Heartbreak is never easy but it does give you a great chance to do something not all people ever try: Get to know yourself. 

I've been single for a long time. 

I'm picky and the last guy I let in broke my heart so I'm not ready to let myself get that raw again.

But it's given me a great chance to get to know myself. 

I've read a lot of articles about dating yourself and I love it. 

What really got me into it though was Taylor Swift. 

Celebrity culture is bigger than ever with the Internet and bloggers, makeup guru's and singers all over YouTube. Anyone can become famous with a bit of dedication and a computer. 

Taylor Swift is my idol. 

I follow everything she does and appreciate it all. She's like a close friend. Her music has helped me through some of my most difficult times and I'm forever grateful for her. 

During the time between 'Red' in 2012 and '1989' in 2014, Taylor went through a big image change and she made it clear that she was the girl who 'rarely had a boyfriend' over the one who always did. She focuses on herself, her music and her friends. She surrounded herself with strong women who empowered her and made sure her friendships had a positive impact on every person involved. 

I wanted to be like that. 

So I'm still trying to surround myself with women who make me want to be better. 

And I've learned so much about myself. 

I love to cook so I've been trying to expand on that. I'm reading a bit more. 

I'm not saying I don't get lonely but I have incredible friends to help with that. 

I'm enjoying being single for now. I'm 20. I don't need to rug into anything and getting to know yourself can be incredible. 

Jessica 

xoxo

Hopelessly Devoted To... Yourself

Most of us can say that we've gone after someone who wasn't right for us. Maybe they were already dating someone? Maybe they were not right for us in every sense of the word thanks to different opinions? Maybe they were too young or too old? Maybe they didn't know how to treat us?

Whatever it was, we've all been there and it's not a fun place to be. 

Heartbreak is never easy but it does give you a great chance to do something not all people ever try: Get to know yourself. 

I've been single for a long time. 

I'm picky and the last guy I let in broke my heart so I'm not ready to let myself get that raw again.

But it's given me a great chance to get to know myself. 

I've read a lot of articles about dating yourself and I love it. 

What really got me into it though was Taylor Swift. 

Celebrity culture is bigger than ever with the Internet and bloggers, makeup guru's and singers all over YouTube. Anyone can become famous with a bit of dedication and a computer. 

Taylor Swift is my idol. 

I follow everything she does and appreciate it all. She's like a close friend. Her music has helped me through some of my most difficult times and I'm forever grateful for her. 

During the time between 'Red' in 2012 and '1989' in 2014, Taylor went through a big image change and she made it clear that she was the girl who 'rarely had a boyfriend' over the one who always did. She focuses on herself, her music and her friends. She surrounded herself with strong women who empowered her and made sure her friendships had a positive impact on every person involved. 

I wanted to be like that. 

So I'm still trying to surround myself with women who make me want to be better. 

And I've learned so much about myself. 

I love to cook so I've been trying to expand on that. I'm reading a bit more. 

I'm not saying I don't get lonely but I have incredible friends to help with that. 

I'm enjoying being single for now. I'm 20. I don't need to rush into anything and getting to know yourself can be incredible. 

Jessica 

xoxo