The Fake Boyfriend

We all know how it goes.
Generally, if you're a girl, you're going to get hit on on a night out.

Sometimes, that's wanted attention.
Sometimes, it isn't.

For me, the attention I got the other night was not wanted.
My girlfriend was out to 'pull' but I wasn't and I was trying very hard to be a good 'wingwoman'. It worked but, unfortunately, some of the guys she was with had friends who grabbed me and tried to dance with me.

Now, I love dancing. When it comes to that, I'm as game as Ellen and I don't need a partner to get crazy like Taylor Swift does at award shows. ('I'm dancing on my own. Make the moves up as I go')
But I don't love it when guys grab me and dance with me when I make it clear I'm not interested.
So I did what any rationally thinking 20 year old does to make it clear to the guy and told them I had a boyfriend.
That should be enough, right?
If a guy I started dancing with told me he had a girlfriend, I'd nod and say 'sorry' and dance in the opposite direction.
These guys? Nope. They didn't care. One of them told me I was 'gorgeous' so I thanked him but he was still dancing close against me so I repeated the 'boyfriend' thing and he just laughed and said 'let yourself go'. I did not want to do that so I gave my friend the warning glance and we danced away to a different part of the club.
When our guy friends got back, I almost pounced on them; I was that relieved.
One of them was also 'on the pull' so I asked the one non-single guy if he'd do me a favour and pretend to be my boyfriend. He laughed and asked which guy was a creep so I simply said 'all of them'.
One guy was nice though. He started dancing near me and I told him I had a boyfriend and hugged my friend and he shook his hand!
Like, actually shook his hand!
I'm not gonna lie. That made me feel kinda good inside and my friend said it was a good gesture.

Anyway, this is actually an issue.
You see, this may be a casual story about a night out but the problem with it is that I shouldn't have had to think of an excuse in the first place. If I don't want to dance with someone, that should be enough of a reason. I shouldn't have to say the word 'boyfriend' fifty times until I can get away from them for it to be realized that I'm not interested.

I'm not saying I was really angry about it but it's frustrating that girls and women have to make up an excuse while guys just don't dance with the girl.

Maybe it was just that club. Maybe it was the fact that it was a Tuesday.
I don't know.
But it shouldn't be an issue in 2016. Have we not come further than that?

At the end of the day, it didn't ruin my night and I still had fun with my friends.

It's just food for thought, you know?

Jessica
xoxo

Frick.

I would love to have chosen a better title for this post but I feel like that one word manages to sum up all my feelings perfectly.
Today was my audition. I was looking forward to it (even though I was extremely nervous and terrified). I thought that the dancing would be funny, the acting horrible and the singing easy. I was wrong. The dancing was horrible! I was trying to smile but I couldn't do it and my leg didn't go very high and it was all a disaster. And I pulled a muscle or something in my right leg so it was all really painful (this is what happens when people who never exercise do even the tiniest bit). I'm sure the dance teacher person thought I was a joke. Probably not actually. He seemed too nice. Still. I was pretty bad.
The acting wasn't as horrible as I thought it was going to be but it was still bad. The thing is though, I actually tried really hard and I knew my lines! I'll admit that I only learnt it the hour before the audition started but I had it, I really did! I practised in the bathroom a few times and I knew it really well and I was having fun. As soon as I entered the room though, it all went in the pooper. I was awful. I kept messing up the lines and getting flustered. Basically, I was dreadful.
And as for the singing... This was the one area that I was confident in. I was sort of looking forward to it actually. I knew both songs off by heart and I was ready to sing even though I've never sung (properly) in front of more than one other person. I got in there, started singing 'Hopelessly Devoted To You' after singing a really quick snipit of 'Locked Out Of Heaven' because one of the directors didn't know what song it was. I got to the end of the chorus and they stopped me (obviously, I panicked). Anyway, they told me they wanted more power or something. I am not a belter. Therefore, I continued panicking. I then had to shout for a few times and I don't think I did it right then either. They didn't ask to hear 'Locked Out Of Heaven'.
After a ridiculous amount of apologies, I left the room (only two apologies but still). I talked to the friends I had made that day about how awful it had went. It was one of those moments when you realise that the thing you're most proud of about yourself, your greatest skill is actually not very good at all. I feel like crap. I was, obviously, too awful for them to be able to stand hearing me sing another song. Or wreck it rather.
I stayed for a while after that until the end and listened to a director talk about the course. It's really interesting and it'll suck when I get that letter saying I haven't made it into the course. Oh well. I tried, I suppose. There's always next year...
On a lighter note, when I got home, I discovered that the 'Girl Most Likely' (or is it 'Imogene'? I don't know! There was a name change a while ago and it's all too confusing for me) trailer had been released. Being a fan of Darren Criss, the fact that he is in a new movie and is half-naked at times and is, generally  perfection brought my mood up a little. I'm so proud of him! He'll never know (nor will he ever care) but I am so happy for him. He is one of the most talented people I have ever had the pleasure of watching on TV and YouTube and I can't think of anyone who deserves it more. Just going to have to ignore the fact that Kristen Wiig (Is that how you spell her name?) gets to kiss him, dance with him, pretend to have a crush on him or whatever and pretend to have had sex with him or I'll get extremely jealous. Screw it, I'm already jealous. That's not the point though. I'm really proud of him and I can't wait to see his new movie when it comes out later this year.

Audition

This post is way more optimistic. As promised.
Tonight, I went to an Open Evening at the MGA Academy. It. Was. Awesome! I was going to go with a friend but she cancelled last-minute (understandably. She's not really into the whole singing/acting thing so she probably wouldn't have enjoyed it). Anyway, I walked in on my own and met a really nice guy (He also got my 'Glee' reference later on about feeling like Rachel Berry when her and Kurt went to that NYADA open day in Season 3 so, of course, I loved him) called Robert. I kinda just stuck with him because he seemed nice and I was a little terrified. We talked to a few students and things before having a tour of the Academy. It's quite small but they only accept about 30 students or so to a course every year (I think it's that anyway... Might be wrong). After the tour, Robert and I (along with a few other people who had come along to the open evening) went to watch the dancers. They were incredible. So flexible and coordinated... I just can't. It was too stunning. After that, we went to see the singers. They were impeccable. I couldn't stop staring! I immediately wished that I had their talent and stage presence. They were all so confident! It was nauseating how good they were. It made me a little nervous. I kept thinking 'I can't dance like that...', 'There's no way I could sing that well!' and 'Well, I'm screwed.'
After the singing, we talked to a few of the students again. Everyone was so nice and passionate! I just wanted to be a part of it all so much (even though it's twelve - fourteen hour days and a lot of hard work). it's worth it. Now I just have to try to figure out how to act by Sunday... And learn it... Frick.
My audition piece's are a monologue from Macbeth where Lady Macbeth tries to persuade Macbeth to kill the king, 'Hopelessly Devoted To You' from Grease for my musical theatre song and 'Locked Out of Heaven' by Bruno Mars or Sting for my 'any genre song'. I'm good with the Grease song (I've been singing it for years) but I need to work on 'Locked Out of Heaven'... I am the least sexy person I know and that song oozes sex. It's also a bit more risqué than I'm used to. Kinda more of a ballad type person. And I don't even want to think about the monologue... Too terrifying for words...
Hoping my audition goes well on Sunday. Robert's audition for the same course in on Sunday too so, at least, I'll know someone.
Fingers crossed...

South Africa: Friday and Saturday

Friday: We went to both Zwelibanzi and Dloko. It was really fun! We went to Dloko first and they sang and danced and performed for us. We also got up and sang with them which was great. One girl danced right in front of me and I thought she was going to kick me (she didn't, thankfully) but it was so good! I took so many photos!
At Zwelibanzi, they did a performance as well which was equally amazing. I gave my buddy (most awesome person ever) a ring I've had for three years (and wear constantly) and my kilt thing from dancing. She was so happy! I gave her chocolates. It was so sweet! She started crying though when we were leaving which was really sad so I started singing a bunch of songs to try and bring her mood up. It worked and we just sang for a while. It was lovely. I've never sang so much in my life!
Dinner was at a place called 'Hemingways' and it was fine. I was a bit too tired to really have any fun but I enjoyed talking to a couple of teachers and fellow students on the way back. Twas much fun.
Saturday: Today, we went to a couple of markets. I spent quite a lot of money... I hope everyone likes their presents! I bought a few skirts, bracelets and necklaces (all African themed of course. I'm not exactly going to go to Africa and buy a Union Jack bracelet am I? As much as I love all things British) and a couple of bags. Also got two rings from a great jeweller called Chantel Wild who designs amazing things (I'll put the link to her website somewhere below or something so that whoever reads this in the future (me) can look at more of her beautiful jewellery. We went to a water park and it was so cool! I met a guy called Keaton (that's probably not how you spell it but you get the idea) and he was telling me about the ride we were about to go on (a tornado thing or something. Whatever. It was really fun anyway). He was really nice (also really hot which was an added bonus). When I told him we were from the UK, he said I didn't sound it so I talked in an English accent for a little bit which was funny (well, it was for me. Not sure if he enjoyed it as much as I did). The rides were awesome! I loved it!
Dinner was really fun! I got loads of pictures and talked to so many people! I had a really long talk about Zulu (not sure if that's right but I'll go with it) marriage requirements with two South Africans and a guy from my school which was interesting. Apparently, to be worthy of marriage to a virgin woman, a man must buy her eleven cows. It was a really funny conversation.
http://www.wildbydesign.co.za/ <---- Link to Jewellery thingy I mentioned earlier in this post.

South Africa: Thursday

I went back to Dloko but for the whole day this time. It was so much fun! I don't tend to sing in front of people (besides when I'm singing to myself) but I sang constantly! Two teachers and a couple of students told me I had a really nice voice which was really sweet. I think it was just because I was singing so much and I hadn't really done that before. It was amazing! I had so much fun! I helped teach the choir some dances and a couple of songs ('Loch Lomond' and 'Auld Lang Syne') which, I think, they really enjoyed. I also taught a few non-choir girls the lyrics to 'Loch Lomond'. They taught us a couple of South African songs too. It was awesome! A few students pulled me into their group and taught me the song and dance while the teachers and other students in the room were taught by the choir teacher. It was really fun singing and dancing with them!
Seeing as it was Valentine's Day, the restaurant we went to was decorated (there were rose petals and glittery things on the table) which was okay. I'm not really a huge fan of it (the moan of a single girl who's fine being single until February 14th comes along and reminds her that no one loves her...). I ordered a glass of rosé and the guy beside me laughed a little. In the end, him and his friends ordered a bottle and split it between them. They got another bottle later on. I feel like they might have been mocking me a little bit but it was kinda funny seeing them drink it. Especially as they didn't even like it.